Post Grad

Tony came down this morning and we laid in bed for hours. I felt like a slob and finally drug my ass to the bathroom and too a shower. He joined and we laughed. It was cute and i can't wait for the rest of my life to be a giant laugh with him.

Sometimes I'm worried about the husband that Tony will be. I'm scared that he's not going to take our situations seriously. Like now for instance, I asked him to move in with me next year. He said he would at first, but now is all stand-off-ish about it. I don't know what's made him change his mind, but it sure has changed a bit in these past few weeks as the move in date drags closer.

He always says he'll worry about it later when the time gets closer. Well I don't know when he'll actually start to worry about the future. Its like its all a big joke for him. He acts like we are still in high school. Honestly, it scares me. I CANNOT MARRY A HIGHSCHOOLER.

I'm confused as shit these days.

I am scared that in a year I'll be a jobless fool living on the streets trying to scrounge up enough dollars to pay my student loans back.

I'm stupid.

I hate my classes.

Why did I pick eecs? Did i really think it'd be easy or something? That it'd be SO cool that I'd like it so much that it'd be easy. Did i think it'd be high school part two?

I'm an ass.